A stationery store clerk comes on to Elaine as she special-orders a high-end mechanical pencil for Justin Pitt, so she uses Jerry's number to screen out the clerk's calls. Elaine asks George and Julie, going to lunch at Monk's, to get the "big salad" to go for her. George pays for lunch in a show of modesty, but Julie takes the big salad to Elaine and gets thanked.
Kramer returns from a golf game with former baseball star Steve Gendason, which nearly came to blows when Kramer, splitting hairs, penalized Gendason for illegal ball-cleaning. The news soon reports that Gendason is wanted for murdering his dry cleaner over a stained pair of pants, and Kramer jumps to the conclusion that he pushed Gendason over the edge.
Resentful that Julie "took credit" for the big salad, George goes out of the way to tell Elaine that he bought it. Elaine does not understand why this matters unless George wants to get paid back, and tells Julie as much. Julie confronts George for his pettiness, but he doubles down, and drives her away.
Jerry stays home with Margaret rather than go out, leading to an awkward reunion between her and Newman, who used to date. Jerry learns, to his horror, that Newman—who is in no position to turn down women—broke up with her. Demanding to know why, Jerry plays right into Newman's hands, and gets told that Margaret was not attractive enough. Haunted by this, Jerry can no longer kiss Margaret, and she throws him out of her car.
Elaine buys the pencil elsewhere, but the clerk has filled her order. Elaine gets guilt-tripped by the clerk's arduous quest at the stationery warehouse, and goes out with him after all.
Consumed by a guilty conscience, Kramer goes to see Gendason. Later, on a live news report, the police are in hot pursuit of Gendason as he flees down the New Jersey Turnpike in a white Ford Bronco with Kramer at the wheel. Kramer calls 911, negotiating for free passage to go visit Gendason's pet fish.